Jan 26, 2017 1
A new year sees the end of one theme, and the beginning of another.
In 2016, I chose ‘Share’. I’ve reflected on it over the past few weeks, and worried that I’d chosen a ‘soft’ theme – one that simply involved ticking some boxes. I shrugged off the things that I’d managed to share, and instead made a list of the things I’d failed to share. And when I communicated this to others, they pointed out that I was stuck in my usual routine of magnifying the bad and diminishing the good.
Here’s a picture of some of my thoughts on ‘Share’, and my first forays into 2017’s theme, ‘Control’:
‘Control’ scares me. It’s a theme I’ve been avoiding for years, skirting around the edges of it and looking away. But I’m coming to admit that I believe that, without maintaining tight control over everyone and everything, I’m nothing. That everything will come falling down.
This is a profoundly unhealthy way of being. It ignores both reality, and the sovereignty of others. And it’s something I think I need to tear down – not something that can be chipped away at gently. Hence, ‘Control’ scares me, because I’m obsessed with it, and can’t yet envision what life would look like in the absence of that obsession.
Here’s another picture I made about it, after a bit more thought and some more conversations:
I think there will be more pictures, and there will certainly be more reading. I’m not sure where this will all lead, but I hope it is somewhere better than I am now.